I AM UPSET AND BETRAYED!

So, I have never read Pride and Prejudice before. I was actually actively avoiding reading it because it has that same aura that The Great Gatsby has. That "stupid wealthy white people doing things that are pointless" aura. I get the point of Great Gatsby and Mrs. Dalloway, they're writing a narrative about how crap these people are and their actions. But my issue is that people eat this universe up. There are Gatsby parties where people dress up and are useless. USELESS!

Okay, so anyway, I wasn't stoked to start this book. And then I started it. And I still hated it.

Hate is a strong word but I'm gonna use it anyway. I really hated these people (expect Mr. Bennet. I will get Mr. Bennet tattooed on my ass I love him so much) and what they didn't do and how they are nothing but useless lumps of flesh. I sat in the English department and told anyone who passed by that I was in pain. 

Reasons why I hated P&P in the beginning:

• Throwing shade
• Obsession with marriage
• Rude behavior
• Regency era stuff that I don't understand and then just got upset about.
• The class system makes me want to spork out my eyes

So, there I am, inspiring English professors on making a class based around useless white people when I decided to ask. Why? Why do people like this book? (Please answer for yourself if you like this book, I want to know!)

Dr. Sandona's answer is that he really likes the way that it's written. The language is really appealing and he appreciates how Austen created this world for readers to escape to during the Napoleonic Wars (Personally, this world sounds like a special ring of hell).

Dr. Mitchell-Buck was all about the narrator. Having a snarky narrator who tells the story but gets punished/chastised for it is refreshing and rewarding. 

I didn't officially ask Dr. Orloff but she digs Jane and hates Mr. Collins and Mrs. Bennet. 

These are good answers. I appreciate them and they have helped me get through the book. Once I was on a roll I kept myself going. With the aid of Mr. Bennet and a pen I marked my way through the book. What super helped me were The Lizzie Bennet Diaries.

I fell in love with the characters, I fell in love with the way the story was crafted, I fell in love with the story changes, and totally fell in love with the LOVE! I was so friggin' stoked for all the little romances and it made me turn to the book with new happiness and excitement.

Then I got to thinking. No one put romance at the top of their list as to why they liked this book. Before reading this book I had seen that Keira Knightley movie so i was expecting some awesome love action in the rain and stuff.

Look at that! Look at that deceleration of love and stuff! That's what I was expecting from the book. Nope. It was not nearly as romantic as I wanted it to be. My romance boner was gone.

 

They take a walk in the garden, go over how they had once perceived each other and how they have not changed, and then they part ways APPARENTLY ENGAGED. WHAT? I SO CLEARLY DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS TIME PERIOD. HE DIDN'T ASK HER TO MARRY HIM! WHAT IS GOING ON!

How did this happen? Someone with a history boner needs to tell me when it was unacceptable to have the spicy-sauce relationships that Shakespeare wrote and replace it with this passive romance. It was such a let down for me that the ending is actually ruined. THEY DON'T EVEN KISS....WHAT?! THAT'S NOT EVEN WHY I'M UPSET. I mean, look at this chemistry!

THAT IS A CUTE SPICY MEATBALL! I was expecting this from the book, and it let me down. 

Don't get me wrong, I am glad that I read the book. I can check it off my list and be in the in crowd of people that 'get' Pride and Prejudice (or fake it at least). I love how Austen does dialogue, Mr. Bennet is my homie, and the book totally wrapped me up in it's dramatics. I was laughing and faux-gasping as I read it which I haven't done in a good long while. I liked it but I probably wouldn't read it again too soon. Like, if I ever have a kid and they have to read it for class I might pick it up again just to keep the neurons firing. 

As far as the feminism in this book goes, I feel like its something that I will need the class to help me understand better. I see little snippets here and there that might be considered feminist but I can't get past that the entire society these people live in revolves around marriage. No matter what personality the men and women may have its all about how they're going to attached themselves to each other. I'm not seeing a who bunch of autonomy here. I mean, I am. The fact that Elizabeth can say no to Mr. Collins and Darcy is pretty impressive and autonomous. I dunno. THIS STUFF IS HARD!! Alright, I should go to sleep now, the cold medicine is hitting me now.

Ooooh, Fandom I love you. [How much?] Hella

I don't even know where to start. Okay, that is a bold-faced lie. I have like 400 places I could start but I am going to start by bringing up what I scratched at in class.

I loved Star Wars Uncut. It filled me with strawberry bubbles and kittens (all of which had to be surgically removed) and it makes me more of a Star Wars fan than before. But why? Why are bearded Leias and cat Lukes endearing to me?

Because that's what we are inside. There is something out there that fills us with nerd joy till we're bursting. We consume movies like candy, binge watch T.V. shows, and read book series until they makes us cry like 2 year olds. We scream (in happiness) at the sight of Lady Gaga and Beyoncé and dress up as anime characters. Isn't that just the best thing?!

I am a fan of many things and Fans are one the them. I mean, just look at them.

No, but seriously. Fans are the best. They are smart, funny, creative, sexy, and lovely. Are there some assholes out there? No, not at all. All of them are perfect and amazing and rainbow-butterflies fly out of their mouths and- Absolutely, there are assholes out there. But don't crap on the entirety of a pretty amazing part of humanity. We are obsessive and that behavior can produce something as charming as Star Wars Uncut.

I am not the best at expressing why fandom is useful or good thing but I have to believe its true. I mean, it just makes me so happy to hear people just humming the background music of a specific scene in a movie. That shows a connectivity that I can't really put into words right now and probably not for a while.

This leads me to the Fandom assignment. I and super duper stoked to be a part of this but at the same time I am a bit wary. I don't know if I'm up for such a task. I mean, don't worry, I will be charging at it with a stupid amount of ferocity but I don't think I'll be able to express fandom properly. I don't even know if it can be done. I just know that I really, really, want to.

 I want to tell someone I read fanfiction and not have them look at me like I'm a child. I want to have important and moving conversations about ships without being misconstrued as a crazed fan. I want people to understand that they can read some really awesome porn online and shamelessly share it with others who like that....but...ya'know...not awkward.

This is going to be a lot of fun but its probably going to send me into a dangerous spiral of self analysis. Just like a mad dunk did to this man.

Look at him...Look how far into himself he is sent. Where is he? Who is he? Is he me? Yes. That is my future. I'm going to get dunked on by this Fandom project.

The World is like a Writer Suffering From a Severe Case of Writer's Block...But that's okay.

So my memory is pretty bad. The things that I remember about my own life are some of the most useless memories one can have but its worked for me so far...But I totally don't remember watching Star Wars for the first time. I mean, I'm sure young me was excited about it or something but who knows.

I remember being forced to watch Lord of the Rings and I was not there for that. I was very anti-movies when my family wanted to show me something. I was a jerk as a kid.

Anyway, watching Star Wars for this class was kinda like watching it for the first time. I hadn't remembered anything and so it was actually like a brand new movie. I felt like I was meeting new characters and watching something innovative even though I knew the plot and exactly what was going to happen.This is where I got to thinking about Joseph Campbell's quest narrative study.

Its hard to not get peeved at the idea of there being one entertaining story that only had the most minute changes made to it and then it's sold to us. But, and this is me completely disregarded the subconscious blah blah, wasn't this narrative new to us at some point? When you're reading a book as a kid you don't have the library of knowledge as when you're an adult and so each story is different. Even if it is a quest narrative that checks off all of the requirements you really aren't going to know that until you've read other things. You're sitting there thinking it's the most amazing thing in the world and that no one has ever (or can ever) write something like that again. Tons of people probably never bother to see that many T.V shows they watch, movies, and books are quite similar. And I don't think that its a bad thing.

I really don't think acknowledging that there is a rhythm, pattern, system, whatever detracts from the initial experience at all. I don't think that it shows a lack of creativity or innovation because it isn't readily apparent. I also think that time will really tell if Campbell's idea is true. It can be true for now and for much of the past but there is still a universe of uncharted territory in story telling. With new technology like the internet new narratives are being created every second and that is astounding. So don't be so down! There is a new story out there waiting to be written in GIF format! GET PUMPED TO WITNESS A NEW KINDA STAR WARS!!!! YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!